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FUNNY PET & ANIMAL PHOTOS, COMEDY, HUMOR & WITTY INSULTS

Top 10: Jokes Actually Worth Telling

1. ‘’Dyslexic man walks into a bra’’

 

2. ‘’I said to the yoga instructor “Can you teach me to do the splits?’’

       He said, ‘’How flexible are you?’’ I said, ‘’I can’t make Tuesdays’’.

 

3. I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.

 

4. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named

      ‘Amal.’ The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan.

 

      Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture,  she tells her husband

      that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

 

      Her husband responds, ‘’But they are twins. If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.’’

 

5. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any.

 

6. When Susan’s boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: ‘’I love the simple things in life, but I don’t want

      one of them for my husband’’.

 

7. ‘’My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.’’


8. A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, ‘’Is this some kind of     joke?’’

 

9. Four fonts walk into a bar, the barman says ‘Get out! We don’t want your type in here.’’

 

10. A man who entered a local paper’s pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in     the hope that at least

         one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.